All About Warcraft Film Review


To sum it up: Frustration, her name is Warcraft. Or rather, her name is Duncan Jones. With a huge mythology to work with and seemingly limitless opportunities to create a film that does not make sense and does not connect viewers even at the most basic level, this is a crime against celluloid. Half a class for Glenn Clowes episodic role and a very good graphics and a VFX. Rating: D

“This is a Boom stick” – Ash Evil Dead III, Warcraft’s dwarf weapons master, talks about his best

With an interval of more than two hours, it seems that four have passed. This is one and a half hints about her poor theater-the headquarters of Tucha and her poor confused brain. Confused? Yes, because thanks to Warcraft, an overwhelming question will come to mind:

What’s going on here?

I have no clue. I want to tell you. And, apparently, the scriptwriters, the director and the actors do not know either. Damage. The trailer was fantastic. That really drove me crazy. Unfortunately, the confusing scenario, in which it seems that no one bothered to check the integrity when the rewrites were made, messed up this film. Mutilated without hope of salvation.

It’s a great pity, because the cast is as playable as possible, since they are all surprised that they see those who know that they made a terrible mistake that they can never give up.

Earth? Here it is: stop the orcs. It seems that the orcs have finished their home world because they are an evil Juju, and they use a portal that works on the magic of the expired (*da Duuuuum*) to get into the world of people. The evil orc magician must try to lead his orcs through the portal, while the good human magician (who seems a bit uncomfortable) wonders if he is compromised in any way?) try to stop them. There is Ragnar Lothbrok, a good hero, a novice magician, a girl who is a half-brother, a royal AMC preacher, the queen of the tulip O’Hara, Glenn Clowes, who tried to go unnoticed, but is broken, and other people who do not matter. Will people win? Who cares about that?

Screenwriter/director Duncan Jones had obviously gotten too close to his film, and apparently no one had to tell him that nothing makes sense. And this is a pity, a great pity, because Warcraft is beautiful to look at. Artistic direction, costumes, set design; everything is done very well. (Oh yes, and ice wolves are always great, and I always want something like that. So, if CGI looks like CGI from “Harry Potter”, then the human architecture seems to come directly from LOTR, and the orc magician looks like a Skexis from “Dark Crystal”? Hey, if you need a bed, then the bed is exactly what you need.

Okay, if you think that I don’t like everything related to makeup and SFX, then two things have become clear: the half-“quarterbacks” of Garona are terrible. They look like almost melted lollipops. And every time she talks, you can see exactly how they are attached to her real teeth. And the orcs are terrible, there is no doubt about that. Yes, it’s nice to see in them more than plowing during the campaign. But their hands are bigger than their tiny heads (at least in relation to their total body proportions). I think that’s why they are always written silly, like stones?

The worst? The film ends with a hint of a sequel. No, without a hint. There’s practically a flashing “Electric Boogalu” neon sign that keeps screaming to invent farting unicorns and jazzy hands. This pursues two goals: 1) to prepare the ground for another theft of money and 2) to eliminate the need for resolution in the minds of filmmakers.

Hu. My brain hurts. Just watch the poster for an hour and then watch the trailer for another hour. Much better than this weak sauce is the “story”. Do not worry, unless you are a lover of D&D, fantasy or, of course, WoW. Also in this matter, make sure that you are all right when entering. Only then can you get through. Can I offer a tequila? There are a lot of them.

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